


Abject

by camichats



Series: Dictionary Prompts [34]
Category: Marvel
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternative Universe - Kingdom, Defining the Relationship, Established Relationship, Fade to Black, Lingerie, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-06-06 22:40:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15205031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: Bucky's leaving his small town to be with Tony, but he's beginning to think he misunderstood Tony's invitation and wonders if city life is really for him.





	1. Chapter 1

Bucky had seen horses before. To be precise, he’d seen Stevie’s horse, Coop, and Sam’s horse, Maple. Both Coop and Maple were short and thick, hair above their hoofs with manes puffier than Bucky’s hair when he slept on it wet. The horses the Royal Guard-- the Royal  _ fucking _ Guard-- used, were nothing like that. They didn’t have any dangling hair above their hooves-- Bucky didn’t even know horses could be made that way-- and their manes were sleek and trimmed. They were easily a foot taller than Coop and Maple, and their legs weren’t as stout. 

“You never seen a fighting horse?” one of Tony’s guards asked when the group stopped to set up camp for the night. Bucky thought his name was Happy-- or at least that’s what Tony had called him earlier. This was his first good look at the horses surrounding him, and it was unnerving. 

Dumbly, Bucky shook his head. Coop carried packages, and Maple helped Sam farm. Sometimes they’d strap them to a cart together and make a long trip, and Bucky only ever saw similar horses on those trips when he went. This… this was something else entirely. He began to feel out of his depth, but he glanced at Tony, conversing with the others in the group, and felt his determination grow. He loved Tony, and Tony loved him, and he’d implicitly offered Bucky everything he’d ever dreamed of. A little bit of cold feet was normal in the face of getting everything. “Didn’t know they made ‘em this slick.” 

Happy chuckled, giving his horse a pat on the neck as he finished tying them to the tree. “You’ll get to see more at the stables.” 

“There’s more’n just these?” 

“Yeah,” Happy said, laughing a little. 

Bucky knew he didn’t mean anything cruel by it, but there was definitely the edge of ‘how did you not already know that’ to his tone. He swallowed and looked away. This was going to be a long trip. 

* * *

Bucky stuck out like a sore thumb. He didn’t know the places the guards talked about on the trip to the Iron City-- New York Kingdom’s capital-- he didn’t speak like them, he didn’t understand their slang or them his, and anything nearing political talk went over his head. He’d felt out of his depth that first night on the road, but reminding himself that Tony loved him wasn’t helping as much as it used to. 

It was getting to the point that Bucky wondered if he’d convinced himself that Tony said that, instead of him actually saying it. He knew, logically, that Tony wasn’t about to have sex with him in the dirt and no privacy, but he didn’t kiss him even once. He touched him, held his hand sometimes, but Bucky noticed that Tony was a tactile person. He touched all his guards in passing, gave them hugs and shoved them when they were playing a fight. Out of everyone here, Tony paid the least attention to Bucky. And again, he knew that logically, this made a sort of sense. Mostly it hurt like hell. 

It got worse once they were actually in the city. Bucky could dismount without falling on his face now, but after that, Tony was talking with a light red headed noblewoman that had been waiting for him, the guards were going about grabbing their bags and leaving like they’d done this a hundred times, and then there was Bucky, standing there like a lost jackass. 

The noblewoman was poised, her clothes fancier than anything Bucky’d seen, but he got the feeling that this was dressing down for her. She glanced at Bucky, then Tony, then looked at him again, far more pointedly this time. 

Tony turned, face alight with a smile that made him feel weak in the knees. “Bucky! Come here,” he yelled above the hubbub, waving him over. He kissed Bucky’s cheek when he made it to his side and slipped an arm around his waist, making him feel silly for doubting how Tony felt-- for all of two seconds. 

Two seconds because then the woman sighed and said, “Another one, Tony?” 

His heart froze. ‘Another one’? What did that mean? Did Tony make a habit of picking up backwater entertainment for a few months? 

Tony rolled his eyes. “No, not another one. The best one! His name’s Bucky. Bucky, this is Pepper, she’s going to help me run the kingdom.” 

“Am I?” she said, arching an eyebrow. 

“Maybe,” he said to her, then turned to Bucky and whispered loudly. “She totally is.” 

“As you say, your highness,” Pepper said drily, making Tony laugh. Bucky tried to smile. 

“Come on Bucky, I’ll show you inside,” Tony said, moving to walk past Pepper, but she stopped him with a hand in the center of his chest. 

“Not so fast Tony. With Howard and Maria gone, and you missing for six weeks, there’s a lot to go over, and yes it has to be done by you.” 

Tony sighed dramatically and leaned into Bucky. “I wanted to show him around, come on Pep.” 

“You can show him around tonight.” 

“That’s not the same.” 

Pepper shrugged, but she didn’t seem too apologetic. “That’s the best I can do.” 

“Hmph.” Tony turned and kissed his cheek again. “Loki will take care of you. If he acts a little murderous, just ignore him, he won’t actually hurt you.” At Bucky’s panicked look, he added, “He does it sometimes to see how people will react, he’s never killed someone. That I know of, at least.” 

“That’s not helpin’,” Bucky said, more than a little nervous. 

“Tony exaggerates,” Pepper said, waving someone to her side. “Jan, this is Bucky, Bucky-- Jan.” Jan smiled brightly to match her yellow dress and waved even though there wasn’t more than two feet between them. “She’ll escort you to Loki.” 

* * *

Loki, Bucky found out standing in the man’s room, was a courtesan. An honest to god, bonafide  _ courtesan _ of the court, catering his services to the noble and otherwise wealthy. And he was the one Tony sent him to. Guess he didn’t have to worry about wondering what Pepper had meant by ‘Another one?’ anymore. Hearing Loki’s story of how he got here just made it worse. 

“Anthony was of course the prince at that time, and he took great pleasure in testing his boundaries. Picking up someone with zero training from a disgraced town that once rebelled against the crown, was one of his more scandalous, but ultimately harmless, tricks. It caused a ruckus, but there was nothing anyone could do about it. The worst that could have possibly happened was that I wouldn’t be able to do my job, but I still would have had a place to live and food to eat if no one took interest. Don’t look so scared darling, I was as worried as you when I arrived, and look at me now.” 

Bucky looked, and he couldn’t help but think that he’d rather have died on the ship that took his arm than try and be Loki. Loki wore jewels and fabrics richer than the sum of everything Bucky’d seen in his time, and he bore them like they weighed nothing. Just looking at them made Bucky feel bogged down, but Loki stood tall and proud, a person who was a work of art and knew it. Bucky was the broken down, uglier version of him-- that much was clear. Missing an arm didn’t even make that big of a difference when his rough skin was marked and scarred, his hair ragged with just enough of a wave to never be tamed to sleekness, and a body that was too thick for the slenderness he knew popularized tales of beauty. “I don’ think I can do this,” he whispered, overwhelmed. 

Loki put a hand on his shoulder, not a trace of the threatening persona Tony had spoken of in sight. “Take a deep breath,” he said gently. Bucky did so, but it didn’t feel like it helped. “The prince-- pardon me, the king-- will give you gold and passage home should you desire to leave. Many have, and it bore them no ill. But this is the opportunity of many lifetimes for people like us, darling. I would be starving on a snow covered hillside right now if I had chosen to leave, and even if I had plenty of food, that life holds no happiness for me. I thought myself unsuited for this life, and I nearly left. You should give it a chance Bucky. Fortune like this does not visit twice.” 

Bucky took another shuddering breath. “I’ll think about it.” 

Loki squeezed his shoulder once in comfort before dropping his arm back to his side. “I have a few pieces I’d like you to keep, but you don’t have to wear them if you prefer not to.” 

Bucky shrugged with one shoulder. “Guess there’s no harm, right?” 

Loki smiled encouragingly. “Right. Now let’s see…” He went to the side of his room and opened an out of the way trunk. “Ooo this would look good on you, and this, oh and  _ definitely _ this.” He glanced at Bucky. “I don’t suppose I could talk you into trying them on for me?” Bucky didn’t know what his face did, but bare seconds later, Loki said, “So that’s a no. Pity. Well, you’ll look fantastic in them whether I get to see it or not, darling. Come here.” He waved Bucky over and started handing him the pieces he’d chosen-- and Bucky felt very confident calling them ‘pieces’ and not outfits because there was no way he’d call these scraps of fabric  _ clothing _ . Some of them were panties, but there were others that hinted at a modesty that was nowhere to be found. 

All that being said, he could see the appeal ~~for how it would look on him~~  if someone had the right body and for it. He accepted them gingerly. No one would know if he tried them on, after all. 

“That will have to do for now,” Loki said even though Bucky was holding eight different pieces. Hell, he had three outfits total, and here Loki was half-apologizing for giving him eight new ones-- even if those eight were skimpy and not meant for wear outside a bed. “How do you feel about jewelry?” he asked, giving Bucky’s neck a speculative look. 

“I’ve- I mean, I’ve never worn… before,” Bucky managed awkwardly. Jewelry was for the rich, or the married and he was neither. Or, he  _ hadn’t _ been. Guess being a courtesan was rich adjacent. 

“I have a few necklaces you can have, I never use them, they’re just using space I’d rather have cleared. Your ears aren’t pierced-- right?” At Bucky’s nod, he continued, “So we don’t have to find you earrings, and rings don’t look like your style. Besides, I think nothing I have would fit you. Necklaces though… Ah! Here we are.” 

Bucky couldn’t see what they looked like because Loki wasn’t making a point of showing him, could only see that they were glinting gold. 

Next thing he knew, Loki was closing the ornate box and striding to the door. “I’ll show you your room so we can drop these off, and then we can see the rest of the castle. It’s quite large, but you shouldn’t have any trouble finding your way.” 

Bucky doubted that very, very much. His and Stevie’s house hadn’t been part of the village, and the village itself was so small that it was called Brooklyn Stop because it was the last town on the Brooklyn Bridge road before reaching the city and wasn’t big enough to warrant an original name. 

“Down the hallway and to the right from my room is your’s,” Loki narrated as they took that path. He pushed the door open and set the pile of necklaces on the table that was just inside the room. “There’s a latch on the door, if you wish to not be disturbed. Short of breaking it down, no one will be able to get in. Now, would you like a tour of the castle and grounds, or would you like to rest?” 

“I- uh. It’d be nice to know where everythin’ is,” Bucky hedged. 

Loki nodded, like he’d expected that answer. “We’ll go to the kitchens then. After your room, it’s the most important place to know,” he said with a wink. Bucky was pretty sure winks weren’t supposed to look so refined. He followed Loki out the door and down the hall. He was confident he could remember the way two turns in, but then there was a fourth and he started to feel lost. If Loki decided to tease him by vanishing, Bucky wouldn’t be able to find his way back to his room; he’d probably wander around until he found a chair and sit there until someone rescued him-- not that he thought Loki would do that to him. 

Everyone that worked in the kitchen was kind and welcoming, but Bucky could only offer awkward smiles in response to their hospitality. They invited him to come by anytime he was hungry day or night, and he thanked them as politely as he knew how and ate the fresh bread they all but shoved at him. 

“Do you want to go back to your room?” Loki asked quietly, once the door behind them had closed. 

Bucky nodded, taking what was surely an unseemly bite out of the bread. What did he care, only Loki could see him, and he hadn’t had fresh bread since he was a child. He made it back to his room, and Loki reminded him that he was just down the hall if he had any questions or didn’t want to be alone. Bucky nodded even though he had no intention of leaving unless he was starving. 

He laid down on the bed, staring at the ceiling with the hope to let his mind roam, but he immediately noted how soft the mattress was and how ornately the ceiling was decorated. Who needed a painted ceiling? And it wasn’t a single color, or even a pattern, it was like a mural. A  _ mural _ on his room’s  _ ceiling _ because why not? 

He took off his shoes and stood on the bed to get a better look. His balance wasn’t the best, especially on something as soft as this mattress, but if he fell, he’d land on the bed and there were worse places to fall. There was a dragon terrorizing a village, when someone regal-looking was sent from the palace to save the day. Bucky assumed there would be some dragon slaying, but instead they tamed the dragon and brought them back to the village to help rebuild, and eventually they brought the dragon home with them. That explained why the Stark crest was a dragon, then. 

He let himself fall back onto the bed and stared at the mural numbly. What was he doing? He didn’t belong here. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky has some body insecurity, him and Tony straighten things out.

Bucky laid on his bed, wondering if he should try and sneak out before Tony came to see him-- assuming he even did. It was his first day as king, it was likely he’d be too tired and forget about coming to visit him. He wouldn’t notice if Bucky left, and he wouldn’t miss him for more than a week or two. Bucky would be able to go back to his life with Steve and the river near their house and their little Brooklyn Stop town where the highlight of his month was a book Sam managed to pick up. Then he thought about Loki telling him how he had nearly given up and left, and he ended up moping for a while longer.

Inexplicably, he found himself staring at the pile of clothes and necklaces Loki had given, interest stirring. He flushed and rolled over, his back to the table. A minute later, he was getting off the bed and padding towards the table with hesitant steps. Nobody would know if he looked through them or maybe… tried some on?

No, no he couldn’t do that.

But they were in a _pile_ right now, and he’d have to untangle the necklaces and put the lingerie away eventually, it might as well be now before anyone else could see them. First to come out was a choker, black fabric embroidered with fine golden thread, probably to be paired with the sheer robe Loki had given him. It was a nice image, but Bucky didn’t think he could do the clasp of a necklace that tight with one hand. He set it aside and separated the remaining mass of gold, one torturous loop and chain at a time. When he was finished, he moved to the different pieces of lingerie, laying them out so he could look them over.

He chewed on his lip, cheeks heating the longer he stared at them. Nothing bad had happened for him looking at them, and _nobody_ would know if he tried them on for a minute or two.

He slid out of his shirt and draped it over the back of the chair. He brought his foot up to help unbuckle the shoe and slid it off, setting it out of the way and undoing his other one. He undid the buttons on his pants and pulled them down and off with his underclothes, putting them over the chair next to his shirt and turning to the bed where he’d laid everything out.

Bucky didn’t need to try on everything, he reasoned to himself, just one or two that he thought would look good on him. With a furious blush, he snatched the pair of red lace panties off the bed and walked to the large mirror in the corner. He set them on the floor and stepped into them, pulling them up a little awkwardly with his one hand. It took some situating, but he got them to fit right-- or at least how he _thought_ they were supposed to fit. In order for it to cover his dick, he had to pull it up high in the back, leaving half his ass hanging out. As foreign as it felt to him, he was pretty sure this was how it was meant to fit.

He looked down at his body and couldn’t really see the appeal. The panties were fancy, but they didn’t look good on him. He looked slightly better in the mirror, but he was still a big, hairy man wearing something made for people built differently than him. Loki had seemed so sure he’d look good in them that Bucky looked harder, trying to see what Loki saw/imagined, but all he could see was a person crammed into the wrong clothes. He turned around and looked over his shoulder at his reflection to see if it looked any better from behind. The answer was yes, but it wasn’t enough that he’d feel comfortable showing anybody. Maybe Tony, back when he’d thought that Tony had meant ‘I love you’ the way Bucky wanted (not that he knew what Tony meant by it even with his newfound knowledge).

He sighed and slumped over, rubbing at the back of his neck. If he was honest with himself… if he was honest, he liked the way he looked in these delicate little panties, but he felt like he shouldn’t. He was a fisherman who used to be a sailor; he was supposed to like big, loud parties and sensible clothing. He _knew_ he was supposed to like those things because his crew-- the Howlies-- had been like that, and any other sailors they ran into were the same way, with Bucky always being the stick-in-the-mud who didn’t know how to have a good time.

Well fuck them. He was plenty happy now. He turned back to the mirror with a bracing breath, holding his head high and trying to mimic Loki’s posture. He looked silly, so he let it go with a shake of his head and walked over to the pieces again. Even though he thought other people wouldn’t like how he looked, he picked up a heavy necklace and took a minute to clasp it on. It had several loops that all connected at the one point in the back, each loop larger than the last. The first one fell to where most necklaces laid-- high on his breastbone-- and the last one set below his navel. Each loop had small plates of gold cut into designs and strung together, creating a tinkling half-shirt over his pecs.

He swallowed, running his hand down the necklace and over his hip. As nervous as he’d been, he couldn’t deny that he liked how this looked. The red and gold together brought out his flush, making him appear delighted instead of embarrassed. It drew focus away from his missing arm and the scars on that shoulder. He looked… desirable. Maybe not for everybody, but he couldn’t change his body. As long as someone wasn’t expecting the slim, willowy type, he wouldn’t disappoint.

Tony gave a knock of warning before he walked into Bucky’s room, and Bucky froze, a flush returning and rushing throughout his body with a vengeance. He’d _completely_ forgotten to latch the door shut, thinking that no one would visit him. “Hey Bucky, Loki said you were-- oh.” He stopped when he saw what Bucky was wearing, giving him a slow look up and down. He cleared his throat and looked back to make sure the door had closed behind him. “What are you wearing?”

Bucky ducked his head in shamed embarrassment. “Loki thought it would look good on me,” he mumbled, walking away from the mirror and towards the chair where he’d set his clothes, all traces of his confidence gone now that he was faced with someone actually seeing him. “I told him not to bother.”

“No,” Tony blurted, stumbling over his feet in his hurry to walk around the bed and get to Bucky. “No Bucky _god_ I did not mean it like that. I just meant that I never expected to see you wearing something like this. I am _definitely_ not complaining.” He licked his lips and reached out to trace his fingers around the edge of the necklace, ghosting over Bucky’s skin. “Loki gave you these?”

Bucky nodded.

“I’ll have to thank him.” He reached the bottom of the necklace and moved his hand lower, over Bucky’s abdomen and down to the top of the lace.

He swallowed thickly. His skin tingled where Tony touched him, leaving a trail rippling across his torso, but he couldn’t enjoy it, not when he hadn’t yet come to terms with his place here.

“I don’t know what he was thinking putting you in this room,” he continued, not noticing Bucky’s hesitation to do anything more. “This is for courtesans, we’re just going to have to move you to my room. Mm, we’ll move you tomorrow though. They’ll have to clean this one anyways, might as well use it.”

Bucky felt his mind jolt to a stop. “What?”

“What what?” Tony asked with a confused frown, reluctantly dropping his hand to his side.

“I- your room?”

“Yeah,” he said slowly. “What about it? You can have your own room if you want, I just thought… well, you know.” He gestured vaguely at Bucky. “You came all the way to the capital for me, so I figured we were serious, but we can take it slower if you want.”

“You sent me to Loki.”

“Yes, and?” Tony asked, not getting the point.

“Loki’s a courtesan.”

“So?”

“So you sent me to a _courtesan_ to show me around, an’ when Pepper met me, she said ‘another one’? An’ Loki told me how he came to be here, doin’ this job.”

“I- Bucky I told you I loved you. What did you think that meant?”

His shoulders started hunching, trying to protect himself while he was so exposed. He felt like a fool even though that wasn’t the way Tony was looking at him. “I dunno. I thought- I- I dunno.”

“Shit.” Bucky snapped his head up to look at him-- because _what_ \-- only to see that Tony was covering his face with his hands. “Okay, I can see how this looks.” He dropped his hands from his face and clenched them together tightly. “I asked you here as my partner, but I didn’t tell anyone else that, so they assumed I was doing what I did as a teenager, which- admittedly was picking up random people and bringing them to court. That’s my fault, and I’m sorry, I’ll talk to Pepper and Loki about it. So are we- are we good? I mean, I know we’re not _good_ good because you’ll need time to trust me and adjust to living in the city as well as living in a castle and with me, but will you stay and let me give this another try?”

“Did you… mean what you said? Before? When you asked me to come with you?”

“About loving you?”

Bucky gave a small nod.

“Yeah.” Slowly, so Bucky could stop him if he wanted, Tony raised a hand to cup his cheek. “I love you. I didn’t mean to make you feel like this sweetheart, and I’m so sorry.”

Bucky put his hand on Tony’s arm for comfort and to keep him in place. “I should’ve trusted you more.”

“I wasn’t exactly making the best first impression.”

“This isn’t the first time we met,” Bucky pointed out with a faint smile.

“I know, but I ignored you on the road, and then when we got here I handed you off without explaining anything to you or anyone else. Since you’ve known I was royalty, I haven’t been treating you very well.” Tony shook his head and moved a bit closer into him. “My only excuse is that I was dealing with a lot, and I took you for granted.” He made a face at himself and tried to move away, but Bucky held him fast. “That doesn’t even sound like an excuse.”

“It’s close enough for me.” Bucky leaned forward and gave Tony a light peck, retreating before Tony could kiss him back.

“I’ll do better by you,” Tony said, looking more serious than Bucky had ever seen him. “I swear.”

“Okay.” Bucky felt a little light-headed and was hit again by the fact that he was practically naked. He’d forgotten about it for a minute while they were clearing things up, but now the nervous embarrassment was back full force. “I, uh, should get dressed.”

Tony sighed wistfully, giving Bucky’s body another thorough look. “If you have to,” he said, stepping back.

“Do you… you really like how I look in this?”

“ _Definitely_ ,” Tony said immediately.

“You don’t wish I was like Loki?”

“If I wanted him, I’d be with him, not you. But I’m with you, so what does that tell you?”

“That you have poor taste?” Bucky suggested, but Tony could tell he was joking.

“If you want to change because you’re uncomfortable, you can. If you’re changing for my sake though, I wouldn’t bother. I’m very happy with you the way you are.”

* * *

Tony pushed Bucky onto the bed, straddling him a moment later and rolling their hips together. “Fuck sweetheart. Why are you still wearing these?” he asked, fingering the edge of the panties.

“Because you pushed me down before I could take them off.”

“That makes me sound mean,” Tony pouted, climbing off him and standing between Bucky’s legs at the edge of the mattress. “I pushed you somewhere soft, and I took off the necklace first.”

“Yeah an’ dropped it on the floor. Where’s all your manners now, highness?” Bucky lifted his hips when Tony nudged him to, sliding the panties off and dropping them carelessly to the side.

“In my dick.”

Bucky laughed. “Not sure tha’s possible.”

“I’m your king, don’t argue with me.”

“What happened to partner?”

“That’s for my Bucky that does _not_ make fun of me.”

“Goodbye forever then,” he snickered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There should be one more fic in this series, a short little thing about Tony spoiling Bucky like we all wanted

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr [@cami-chats](http://cami-chats.tumblr.com)


End file.
